Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Dear Denise Richards,

I have to tell you I'm sorry. First, for thinking you were just one of "those" actresses. You really aren't. In fact, I don't really think of you as an "actress" after watching your show. Don't take that the wrong way. In fact, I think it's actually a compliment that the first thing that comes to my mind when it comes to you isn't your lips attached to Neve Campbell's.

I think of you as a mom, now. From the limited exposure I get to "you" on your show on E!, I think you seem pretty great as a mom, actually. Your daughters, who have the cutest names, by the way, are so in love with you, and it really appears that they are well adjusted little girls.

Sorry about your divorce. That really seems to suck. And sorry about your mom passing away. The thing is, you just seem like a normal girl with some fame. I bet if we both lived somewhere like, oh, say, Albuquerque or Des Moines or Fargo, we'd probably be friends. We'd get our kids together, go to the pool, complain about our bodies after babies, eat fries anyway ... we'd go to the sports bar on Friday night, try to find you a man (a good one), and let my good one watch the kids. We'd get carded and feel good about ourselves, and then we'd drink something like amaretto sours, or maybe even bud light (with lime). We'd share recipes, take walks, join a gym (then never go).

What I'm saying is ... you seem sweet. Love, ME

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